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I find difficulty in controlling my mind and my emotions.

Problem: The girl who used to talk to me a lot now a days scolds me whenever i call her. i want to avoid her but after every two days i feel like calling her. can you suggest me something by which i can control myself and concentrate on my career. Waiting for your reply..

You have already taken the first step to control yourself and to concentrate on your career. Your rational brain, (RB) has realized that you have a problem and has moved to deal with it. It acted to search for advice. Knowing that you have a problem is the hardest part. Most people live with their problems, without any idea that that they can be solved. The remaining part is simple.

Watch your thoughts and urges (physiological responses in your body) and become familiar with them. Matthieu Ricard, a Buddhist monk at Shechan Monastery in Kathmandu said: "One may wonder what people do in retreats, sitting for eight hours a day. They familiarize themselves with a new way of dealing with the arising of thoughts. When you start getting used to recognizing thoughts as they arise, it is like rapidly spotting someone you know in a crowd. When a powerful thought or anger arises, you recognize it. That helps you to avoid being overwhelmed by this thought."

Such self awareness is an RB process. Observe the messages from your subconscious, which make you feel you need to call the girl. You will have an “Aha!” moment of discovery, when you first catch the urge. Observation by RB will shut off the troubling message. You can then go peacefully back to work.

All the best for your career.


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